Saturday, December 31, 2011

New Blog Title

Once again, I'm trying to revamp this blog. The title didn't fit so I decided to get a new one. And since I only post something when I'm trying to avoid doing something else, I thought the new blog title should revolve around procrastination. I give full credit to my boyfriend for coming up with the title and subtitle. He's clever. Thanks, babe!

I love the idea of being a procrastonaut. It sounds so much nicer than being a procrastinator. It's like I'm a space woman exploring new and exciting ways of procrastinating. I have many goals in 2012, which means I'll have many opportunities to procrastinate, which means I'll be blogging more! Fantastic!

Sunday, October 16, 2011

The House of Davids Estate Sale

So this isn't technically a Halloween post, but it does involve a house that's out of the ordinary. I have wondered for years what the inside of the House of Davids looked like (aka Norwood Young's house in Hancock Park). I was thrilled when I found out his house was for sale and I could see pictures of the home. I was even more thrilled when I found out he would be having an estate sale, and I COULD SEE THE INSIDE FOR MYSELF! That day, my friends, was today. Dreams do come true, people!

I arrived at the gates of Norwood by noon exactly. This was the time the estate sale was supposed to open on Sunday. There were about 15 others waiting to get in. The gates hadn't opened yet. How very Hollywood.

We were all getting antsy and I felt like we were outside the gates of Willy Wonka's chocolate factory--and we had the golden tickets! So exciting! And I have to say those statues of David looked much smaller in person. He had one decorated in the Christmas outfit, which made me a little sad, because this will be the first Christmas without those gawdy little statues in Santa hats.

Finally the lady came out to open the gate and we all cheered. Hurrah! Hurrah! The time has come! But she had a bit of trouble opening the gate. It was a little janky and got stuck. You know those crappy sliding closet doors that get off track? It was like that. Some dudes had to help and the whole thing was very anti-climatic. But it finally opened and the make-shift gate was quickly forgotten as we entered...

HOLY MOTHER OF GOD. It was everything I hoped it would be! Tacky magnificence! And he was selling just about everything. From a $5000 Michael Jackson hand statue to paper plates and plastic cups. Very random. The pictures really speak for themselves. Enjoy.

I think this is a Norwood puppet. I'm not entirely sure.

Giant chairs that almost reached the ceiling.

Here's a bunch of pics of the backyard. Yes, that's a giant painting of Norwood.

It's hard to see, but that's a picture of Norwood at the bottom of the pool.

All along the backyard walls was this leaf wallpaper-y stuff.
It was like a perpetual school picture day.

The Christmas section.

I kinda liked this poor little ripped up polar bear.

The infamous Christmas outfits for the David statues!

Among the Christmas decor was O.J. Simpson toilet paper, sparklers and margarita salt.

Back inside...

The giant Michael Jackson glove statue!!!

Me high-fiving the giant hand statue. FYI: That's a clothespin on my shirt for retrieving my purse at the purse check. I guess they were worried someone might sneak off with a statue in their purse.

These chairs are all facing this...

In the kitchen above I met a cute little white dog who liked having her belly rubbed. I think she belonged to Norwood. I'm pretty sure I saw a small slice of pizza in her dog bowl, which I thought was odd.

Norwood Young himself came out at one point and started putting things away that weren't supposed to be for sale. I got to meet THE Norwood Young. Hancock Park Royalty. My first sighting of him was when he politely told a woman that the tacky talking Christmas cartoon lamp thingymagig was actually not for sale (you can see it in the earlier Christmas decoration pictures). It was mistakenly put out. She was fine with that. She just thought it would be a funny Christmas chotsky. Norwood didn't want to part with it. He said the funny thing about it is when you forget to turn it off, you inevitably wake up in the middle of the night to go the bathroom and get freaked out because it talks to you. He loved that memory too much to sell it.

I couldn't believe it was Norwood! I struck up a conversation with him, asked if he was going to miss the place. He said he would, but he's going somewhere that he's really happy about. Then some crotchedy old lady walked through and added, "Some place where you'll draw a little less attention to yourself probably!"

And Norwood said, "Maybe. But I don't mind the attention. I like attention." I made sure to add, "Hey, we live in L.A. We all want some attention." Get over yourself, lady. You're at the wackiest estate sale ever. Relish in it! Don't insult the guy. He's super nice for a dude that has pictures of himself all over the place.

I asked if he was going far or staying in the area. He said he would be in L.A. for a year, mentioned something about a reality show, then he would move to the east coast. After our chat he whisked me away to a secret room where we drank fizzy lifting drinks until we floated up to the ceiling and got so dangerously close to the fan that we had to burp our way down!

Okay, that didn't happen. But it might as well have. His home was wacky and wonderful and perfect. You gotta respect a guy who has no shame in putting a bunch of David statues out front and dressing them up on occasion. I'm pretty sure the neighbors complained, but I'd rather look at those statues than a stack of old couches like MY old neighbors. In fact, I KNOW his neighbors complained, because Norwood put together this awesome music video.

I took a billion more pictures of the place, but I'm getting tired, so I will leave you with just a few more pics of the statues out front.

Wednesday, October 12, 2011

Costume Idea: The Progressive Insurance Girl

Every year I say I'm going to dress up as Flo, the Progressive Insurance girl. Then I choose a different costume. But I still think it's an adorable idea for a Halloween costume and relatively cheap to put together. Progressive Insurance got smart and created their own "Dress Like Flo" page. It's really cute actually. Check it out.

And keep checking back for more costume ideas!

Tuesday, October 4, 2011

Halloween JibJabs

I almost forgot about how much I love Halloween JibJabs. Go find some good pictures and make one right now! Here's the one we did last year with my roommates. We actually downloaded it and played it on a big screen in the backyard at our Halloween party (more info on how to throw an epic party coming soon).

Personalize funny videos and birthday eCards at JibJab!

The Nightmare Before Christmas in 4D!

Yes, you read that correctly. 4D! I can't freakin' wait. The El Capitan Theatre is showing The Nightmare Before Christmas in 3D and 4D. The 4D means there will be wind, fog, snow and other amazing wonders. It's playing throughout October and into the first week of November.

Here's the scoop:

You can buy $10 tix on Goldstar (plus $2.50 processing fee). A great deal, but you have to get there super early to get a good seat.


You can spend $23 on the VIP tix from the El Capitan Theater website. You can choose your seat in advance, and you get popcorn and a drink. The BF and I opted for this choice. I think it's worth the extra ten bucks.

You can also pay extra to eat a Pumpkin King Dinner and get a personalized photo and some other crap. Meh. Didn't really interest me.

In other Tim Burton news, this is the last month to see his exhibit at the LACMA, so do yourself a favor and go see it! It's all kinds of badass. They're also doing a lot of extra stuff during the closing weekend (Oct 29 - 31) like throwing parties and extending the hours. Check out LACMA for more info.

Photo Courtesy of the BF's iPhone. No boyfriends were hurt or eaten by monsters in the making of this photo.

Monday, October 3, 2011

"I Had A Little Trouble With The Scissors."

I think one of the funniest things in the world is when Charlie Brown tries to make a ghost costume for Halloween and comes out with a sheet full of holes. I don't know why, but I find it hilarious.

I also think it would be a great Halloween costume. I hope someone I know decides to take on this costume idea because it's probably one of the easiest costumes in the world to make. Take a cheap white sheet and cut holes in it. Or if you want to make it look cartoony, take a white sheet and paint black dots all over. Or glue/sew some felt dots on it. So many options.

Photo courtesy of a blog I found on the internet whose name I can't remember

Countdown to Halloween!

I stumbled upon and found that every year a bunch of bloggers dedicate the month of October to blogging about Halloween-y type things. A Halloween blogging extravaganza if you will. I felt like the little bumblebee girl in the Blind Melon video who finds a field full of other bumblebee kids. My people!

I signed up to be a Cryptkeeper, of course. The rest of the month will be devoted to writing about Halloween--past Halloweens, upcoming Halloween activities in L.A., favorite Halloween movies, costume ideas. It's basically my love letter to Halloween. I even changed the color of my blog to black so it looks spooky. Clever, I know.

Who knew there were so many fantastic Halloween-esque blogs out there? Check out the list at I'll report back with some of my favorites.

"There he is! There he is! It's the Great Pumpkin! He's rising out of the pumpkin patch!" -- It's The Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown

Image courtesy of Countdown To Halloween

Monday, September 12, 2011

There's A Rat On That Girl's Head

I received my Urban Outfitters catalog in the mail on Friday. This page struck me as a bit odd. One of these things is not like the other. Can you guess which one?

I'll give you a hint. THERE'S A RAT ON THAT GIRL'S HEAD! That's weird, right? I'm all about being fashion forward and taking artsy fartsy pictures, but I gotta draw the weirdness line somewhere. I'm not even sure what piece of clothing they are trying to sell in that photo.

"I love this rat hat, but do you have it in blue?"

Sunday, September 4, 2011

It Would Be Bad If I Got Kidnapped

My laziness has been made more apparent by all the well-dressed people in my neighborhood. There are plenty of actresses, actors and models around here, and I am always amazed at how put together they are ALL THE TIME. Walking to the grocery store, taking out the trash, taking the dog for a walk. It doesn't matter how mundane the task is. They always look nice.

There's this one gal in particular who comes to mind because we are on the same dog walking schedule. I usually just roll out of bed and walk Sam first thing, so I'm wearing whatever I slept in plus a large sweatshirt (because I don't feel like putting on a bra). She always looks like a super model. Same thing goes for night-time dog walking.

This is why, if I'm walking my dog and realize I've forgotten my phone, I panic. What if I get kidnapped? That would be bad. Mostly because my boyfriend would have to give a description to the cops of what I was last seen wearing. And the write-up would go something like this:

The missing woman was last seen wearing yoga pants (even though she doesn't do yoga) and a large 2006 Smokey the Bear 5K Fun Run tee shirt. She also had on sandals with socks, presumably because she's too lazy to either take off her socks or put on real shoes.


Monday, June 6, 2011

Thoughts on the Neighborhood Watch Guy

The other day I saw one of those Neighborhood Watch signs, and it reminded me of when I was a kid and I thought that was actually a picture of the man we were looking for. I didn't know what crime he committed, but it must have been bad because the whole neighborhood was on the lookout for this shadow man with a black trench coat and fedora.

I gotta say, that Neighborhood Watch Villain needs a makeover. He's had the same look for decades! Here are a few suggestions (Warning: My MS Paint skills are amazing).

Add a pink fedora.

Add some bling.

Add some Justin Bieber hair.

Or maybe we should all just admit to ourselves that the Neighborhood Watch Guy is actually Homestar Runner. Notice how they're never in the same place at the same time?

I'd recognize that mouth anywhere.