Monday, June 23, 2008

Pizza For One


I purchased some small DiGiorno microwaveable pizzas at Ralph's this weekend. When I took one out of the freezer for lunch, I noticed that the pizza box was titled, DiGiorno For One.

Pizza...For One? Seriously??? I already know it's for one just by looking at the size. It's a tiny pizza. I don't need a pizza box to remind me I'm eating it by myself. Good God. Why not just go all out and call it something like:


Pizza for the Lonely
Hey Loser, Here's a Pizza For You
You're Gonna Die Alone Pizza

Plus, who does this pizza box think it is, telling me how many people can or cannot eat this pizza? What if two children shared the pizza? Then it wouldn't be pizza for one. Or two people with gastric bypass. Or nine girls with eating disorders?

DiGiorno has some nerve.

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

When Did Dana Carvey Become A Woman?


Who photo-shopped this picture and why? He looks so...androgynous. Whenever I come across this picture I ask myself, "Is that Dana Carvey or my Aunt Norma?"