Friday, August 31, 2007

Just Like A Tattoo

Jordin Sparks seems like a lovely girl. And I know that the point of American Idol is to crank out upbeat pop songs to make money, with little regard to the actual content of the songs. But seriously, have you heard that new "Tattoo" single on the radio? Here's the chorus:

You're still a part of everything I do
You're on my heart just like a tattoo
Just like a tattoo
I'll always have you (I'll always have you)

You're on my heart just like a tattoo? That's the best they could come up with? Does Jordin Sparks even have a tattoo? A heart can't be tattooed. It's an organ that lives inside the body. And don't they know that it is possible to remove a tattoo these days?

Jordin, darling, you seem very sweet. Really you do. I don't even mind that you spell your name with an "I" instead of an "A." But honey, this song is really dumb. Just plain dumb. You'd be better off with something like:

You'll always be with me
Just like an STD.


You're a part of everything I do
Like gum stuck to the bottom of my shoe.


You're on my foot
Just like a bunion.

Maybe I'll just start composing my own pop songs.